Parting Words from Conan O’Brien
“Finally, I have something to say to our fans. This massive outpouring of support and passion from so many people has been overwhelming for me. The rallies; the signs; all this goofy outrageous creativity on the internet. The fact that people have traveled long distances and camped out all night in the <applause> pouring rain… It’s pouring, it’s been pouring for days, and they’re camping out to be in our audience. Really. </applause> Here’s what all of you have done. You made a sad situation joyous and inspirational. So to all the people watching: I can never, ever, <emotional pause> thank you enough for the kindness to me. I’ll think about it for the rest of my life.
And all I ask is one thing. I’m asking this particularly of young people that watch. Please do not be cynical. I hate cynicism. For the record, it’s my least favorite quality. It doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen. I’m telling you, amazing things will happen. <applause> I’m telling you. It’s just true. As proof, ladies and gentlemen, let’s make something amazing happen right now. Here, to close out our show, are a few good friends, led by Mr. Will Ferrell. </applause>”
An FBRP moment.
@tritonrider412
The Power Laws
Has anyone seen these “Power Laws” before? The following e-mail was forwarded to me by a friend recently:
Subject: The Power Laws
The Laws
* Law 1 Never Outshine the Master
* Law 2 Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies
* Law 3 Conceal your Intentions
* Law 4 Always Say Less than Necessary
* Law 5 So Much Depends on Reputation. Guard it with your Life
* Law 6 Court Attention at all Cost
* Law 7 Get others to do the Work for you, but Always Take the Credit
* Law 8 Make other People come to you, use Bait if Necessary
* Law 9 Win through your Actions, Never through Argument
* Law 10 Infection: Avoid the Unhappy and Unlucky
* Law 11 Learn to Keep People Dependent on You
* Law 12 Use Selective Honesty and Generosity to Disarm your Victim
* Law 13 When Asking for Help, Appeal to People’s Self-Interest, Never to their Mercy or Gratitude
* Law 14 Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy
* Law 15 Crush your Enemy Totally
* Law 16 Use Absence to Increase Respect and Honor
* Law 17 Keep Others in Suspended Terror: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability
* Law 18 Do Not Build Fortresses to Protect Yourself. Isolation is Dangerous
* Law 19 Know Who You’re Dealing with. Do Not Offend the Wrong Person
* Law 20 Do Not Commit to Anyone
* Law 21 Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker. Seem Dumber than your Mark
* Law 22 Use the Surrender Tactic: Transform Weakness into Power
* Law 23 Concentrate Your Forces
* Law 24 Play the Perfect Courtier
* Law 25 Re-Create Yourself
* Law 26 Keep Your Hands Clean
* Law 27 Play on People’s Need to Believe to Create a Cultlike Following
* Law 28 Enter Action with Boldness
* Law 29 Plan All the Way to the End
* Law 30 Make your Accomplishments Seem Effortless
* Law 31 Control the Options: Get Others to Play with the Cards you Deal
* Law 32 Play to People’s Fantasies
* Law 33 Discover Each Man’s Thumbscrew
* Law 34 Be Royal in your Own Fashion: Act like a King to be treated like one
* Law 35 Master the Art of Timing
* Law 36 Disdain Things you cannot have: Ignoring them is the best Revenge
* Law 37 Create Compelling Spectacles
* Law 38 Think as you like but Behave like others
* Law 39 Stir up Waters to Catch Fish
* Law 40 Despise the Free Lunch
* Law 41 Avoid Stepping into a Great Man’s Shoes
* Law 42 Strike the Shepherd and the Sheep will Scatter
* Law 43 Work on the Hearts and Minds of Others
* Law 44 Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect
* Law 45 Preach the Need for Change, but Never Reform too much at Once
* Law 46 Never appear Perfect
* Law 47 Do not go Past the Mark you Aimed for; In Victory, Learn when to Stop
* Law 48 Assume Formlessness
–End of Email–
I am the Great Depression
My initial response was after reading the first 20 or so laws. After that many I became uninterested in reading much further, so while I was skimming the last 28, I asked myself, “do people really try to model their behavior after these principles? What would their friendships be like if they followed these ‘laws’?”
I could accept maybe 1 in 10 of these “laws”, and it would depend on the situation and the objective. I think someone who lives according to all of the “laws” would be “powerful” in that (s)he is great at manipulating and taking advantage of other people. But (s)he would miss out on genuine friendships & relationships.
Power is overrated. If you really think about it, we don’t control as much as we think we do (I’ll acknowledge that we do have free will, which I see more a control over ourselves, than control over our external environment).
People are weak & fragile. Our bones break, our knees scrape, we get sunburn, we get sick, we can’t go without food for very long, we need water almost daily, and if we don’t breathe in air for a few minutes, we’re done for. Someone who thinks (s)he is powerful because she can manipulate group of weak & fragile beings is mistaken.
But then again, who am I to say it’s wrong for someone to live their life according to the “power laws”? None of us really know wtf we’re doing here. We make things up & claim it’s the answer in order to make us feel good, safe, etc. If there is an answer, I definitely don’t know what it is (but I find relief by believing that no one else does either).
I pretend that we’re on a journey and that it doesn’t really matter where we end up, because at the end, whatever tangible things we’ve accumulated along this journey become completely worthless. It’s about how we spend our time on this journey (which is why I bought this “the future is now” shirt). I don’t claim this is the answer; it’s just what I tell myself to make sense of things.
Again, if someone wants to spend their time gathering power over others using these “laws”, that’s fine. I’m not in a position to tell them they should live any differently. All I would say is said better by Dustin Kensrue from Thrice:
“Beggars”
All you great men of power, you who boast of your feats -
Politicians and entrepreneurs.
Can you safeguard your breath in the night while you sleep?
Keep your heart beating steady and sure?
As you lie in your bed, does the thought haunt your head
That you’re really, rather small?
If there’s one thing I know in this life: we are beggars all.
All you champions of science and rulers of men,
Can you summon the sun from its sleep?
Does the earth seek your counsel on how fast to spin?
Can you shut up the gates of the deep?
Don’t you know that all things hang, as if by a string,
O’er the darkness – poised to fall?
If there’s one thing I know in this life: we are beggars all.
All you big shots that swagger and stride with conceit,
Did you devise how your frame would be formed?
If you’d be raised in a palace, or live out in the streets,
Did you choose the place or the hour you’d be born?
Tell me what can you claim? Not a thing – not your name!
Tell me if you can recall just one thing,
That’s not a gift in this life?
Can you hear what’s been said?
Can you see now that everything’s grace after all?
If there’s one thing I know in this life: we are beggars all.
Silly Twitterers. | BLOG | mikeshinoda.com
Silly Twitterers. | BLOG | mikeshinoda.com
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Work Shmerk
Why does it seem like the majority of people I know don’t like their jobs? Maybe I choose to hang around people who are dissatisfied with their jobs. Maybe my perception is distorted by confirmation bias. Maybe my own job dissatisfaction influences them. Who knows… maybe the results of the poll I just posted will shed some light on how people really feel about their jobs.
Speaking of jobs, I put in my two weeks notice last Monday. When my boss asked why, I gave him a generic answer, “this isn’t the best place for me”. But here are the real reasons I’m leaving:
1) I’m not buying into the “deferred life plan”. You know what I’m talking about. The idea that you should grind out 50-60+ hour weeks for the next, oh, 10, 20, 30+ years, so that you can one day ”retire” and live the good life. Sorry, I don’t believe it. The “elders” that I know could retire, and some have tried, but it just doesn’t happen. When I ask why they choose to keep working, they answer, “it feels good to be productive”, “because I did retire, and it got boring after a few months”, or “because I love what I do”. Well I want to find that same joy in my work.
2) I’ll never be able to do the things I can do today, tomorrow. When I’m sitting in the office on a Saturday, the family event that I’m missing won’t happen again in the same way – the moment is gone forever. When I’m sitting in the office at 8pm on a weekday while my friends are watching a sporting event, I’ll never be able to relive the experience they are sharing. Literally every opportunity is a once in a lifetime chance. It’s foolish to hope that I could somehow make up later in life all that I’ve missed out on today. These opportunities are one time specials.
3) There’s no financial incentive to work as hard as my boss wants me to. Look, I could work 40 hours per week or 80 hours per week, and the paycheck is the same. I looked up the overtime rules - as a professional, I’m not eligible for mandatory overtime pay. There’s no formal bonus program or profit sharing program. And in “these economic times” (I’m so sick of hearing that), no one is getting a raise. After speaking to other co-workers and experiencing it myself, I’m convinced that the work never ends. The boss always wants us to do more in less time. And even the best case scenario isn’t worth it. 12+ years of 50+ hour weeks w/7 days a week busy seasons and 10% pay raises. So in 12 years I’m making 140k (remember inflation, taxes, and additional living expenses (i.e. kids), so it’s not as much as it sounds), I’m 37 years old with a wife and children, still working 50+ hour weeks with 6 days a week busy seasons, and have spent my most capable years (i.e. when my body is at it’s peak) slaving away in an office. Sorry, but if you expect me to work hard today, you have to reward me today. I’m really just a glorified animal looking for treats. Sniff sniff sniff.
So what am I going to do instead? Well, I’m going to try to live for today. I’m going out on my own as an independent contactor / CPA. I’m already starting a fun, fullfilling, and meaningful partnership/business with my friends. I’m going to find a way to partner up and add value to my older brother’s business ventures. I’m going to make my own hours, and sew as many seeds as possible and hope that some grow into fruit bearing trees. I’m going to make it to those family events and sports games w/friends. I’m going to spend quality time with my GF. Today.
And if it all fails, well dude, at least I tried. I’m sure there will be at least one employer out there willing to exploit, err, hire me to work for him/her. Sniff sniff sniff.
Love,
Mike for FBRP
Vatz Up
Aren't I sad looking? Don't cry for me, I'm already dead.
So I’m blogging right now. I don’t even know what a blog is. How about we learn as we go? Well, some warnings first. First, you need to know that I’m nuts. Seriously, I’m straight up nuts. Don’t be scared, I would never intentionally harm anyone. Just know that I’m kind of crazy. Second, I can be pretty cynical. Remember that what I say is just an opinion, not truth. Third, I’m pretty sensitive, so try not to diss me too hard in the comments. Lastly, some people refer to me as “Lord Voldemort” and claim my theme song is the Star Wars empire theme song. Think about that for before you read my wacky blog. Yes I know Lord Voldemort is not from Star Wars. Peace and Love. Mike for FBRP.
Hey, I’m Mike. I am on fire.
Hello.
My name is Mike. I work at FBRP. Im actually the Vice President, so, yeah, think about that for a while dude. This where I will post shit. yeah, actual shit. serious shit bro…literally.
